{For the first time in a long time, my entire being knew I WAS LOVED by God. This concept was no longer head knowledge; it became heart knowledge.}
Love is one of those concepts of which there is always something new to learn. As a kid, love meant kindness and quality time. When I was younger, my dad showed me love by taking me on hiking adventures and rock hounding explorations. And surprisingly, I felt love when he included me with chores. To this day I remember when my dad specifically found a mini broom that was the same color as his. When I was a teenager, my mom loved me by offering me advice and providing me with the best hugs. As I grew older, I realized that my parents were able to shower me with love and compassion because they had received love from Christ during their devotional time. “We love because He first loved us” was the very essence of their relationship with my brother and I (1 John 4:19). Because they were being filled with God’s love daily, they had an overflow of love for their kids.
Quite recently, I’ve been learning to “live loved by God.” For the longest time, I had the academic knowledge that God loved me and died on the cross to save me from my sins. But I’ve slowly come to experience the beauty and depth of God’s love. Over Christmas break, I had a deep conversation with my parents about the highs and lows of ministry in Hawaii. I expressed my greatest joys of ministry and also expressed challenges as well. As I talked about some of the challenges, my dad patiently listened and finally said, “Sonja, you are loved.” It was such a simple statement but so profound. I remember siting there on the couch thinking, “Wow, he’s right. Why is it so hard for me to rest in this love?” Little did I know what would happen about a month later.
Two weeks ago, I spoke with a friend after the Love Reality Tour program. We talked about our college experiences, purpose , and a few other things. At some point in the conversation I asked him, “How am I supposed to live in this freedom that Christ offers when I’m plagued with fear?” Then he asked what I was afraid of. And then I responded, “I’m afraid of not being enough to meet expectations… I’ve put too much pressure on myself.” My friend said, “Sonja, you are loved.” I started to cry because it finally clicked! For the first time in a long time, my entire being knew I WAS LOVED by God. This concept was no longer head knowledge; it became heart knowledge. He continued, “As you find purpose working in ministry, remember to live loved as a daughter of God.” Just as my friend demonstrated to me that night, love means to be present, to actively listen, and invite others to live in the freedom as beloved sons and daughters of Christ.
Iridescent 